The Adventures of Fists and Jay Episode 1: The Case of the Missing Park Manager
Transcript Welcome to: The Adventures of Fists and Jay! (It is in a black and white format. A raccoon and a blue jay or walking on a street.) Fists: The name's Fists. I fight crime with my partner, Jay. Today, me and him are going to find out a mysterious case about a park manager gone missing. Jay: The name's Jay. I fight crime with my partner, Fists. Me and him are going to find a park manager. Our boss, Donald, is going to give us an assignment and clues. (The two go inside their workplace, Donald's Detectives.) Donald: Hello! Do you two want any sugar?! Fists: No, not really. Donald: Well, you deserve some for being great detectives! (Donald gives them "sugar".) Fists: Uhh......., thanks, Donald? Donald: Mind if I make myself comfortable? Fists: Sure, it's your agency. Donald: Thank you!(Rips his pants off.) Aah! (Fists and Jay look at each other.) Donald: That's better! I was starting to chafe! I missed my vibrancy!(Opens window.) Aah! The nice cold breeze! Now It can flap again! Fists: Can we move on with the case please?! Donald: Oh, right! Well, at the City's local park, a well known park manager has been gone for quite the while. You two should investigate. Fists: Sounds interesting. What do you think, Jay? Jay: It is quite the interesting case. Let's begin. Fists: Agreed. We will see you later on, Donald! Donald: I'll give you sugar when you two come back!(Goes up to the window.) It's okay darling, you can breath now! Aah! So cold and refreshing! (Cut to a park. Fists and Jay are investigating.) Fists: Hm. Hey, yeti! Have you seen a park manager somewhere around here?! Skips: Excuse me? Fists: I'm Fists and this is my partner, Jay. We're detectives. Would you know any managers around here? Skips: Yes, but he's been lost for weeks. I can't say much after this. If you excuse me, I need to get back to work. Fists: Can't say much. Suspicious, don't you think, Jay? Jay: Indeed. Let's investigate more. (Cut to a trailer. Fists and Jay are speaking to a greenish man and ghost.) Fists: Hello. Do you know where a missing park manager could be? Muscle Man: Uh, no bro, and why are you talking like that? Fists: Don't change the subject! Just tell me where he is! Muscle Man: Calm down, bro! I have no idea what you're talking about! Fists: How about you, ghostie?! Hi Five Ghost: I don't know either! Please don't kill me! Fists: Okay, you guys are clean. Time to go to the lollipop man! (Cut to inside Pops's House. Fists and Jay are investigating the lollipop man's office.) Pops: Hello, boys! Fists: Hello, lollipop! Pops: Do any of you want a lollipop? Fists: Heck no! They could be poisoned! Pops: What?! Never! I make lollipops for good, not evil! Fists: Interesting. Do you know any park managers around here? Pops: Oh, yes, indeed! However, he has been lost for a fortnight. I hope you find him! Fists: Fists's log. Lollipop man, okay. Let's go, Jay! We have enough information to show Donald! Jay: Indeed. Let's go. (Cut to Donald's Detectives.) Donald: It's good to see you guys again! (Gives the two "sugar" again.) Fists: Thanks, Donald. I guess. Donald: Do you like the breeze in here? My darling sure does. Fists: Right. Anyway, we got some clues. Donald: Oh, goodie! Tell me them! Fists: Well, the most suspicious one was this yeti fellow. Donald: What about this yeti? Fists: Well, he said, "I can't say much more" after saying the park manager has been gone. Donald: That is suspicious. Anything else? Fists: Not really anything else. Donald: Keep going. We need more evidence. I'm glad you're trying though! I'll give you sugar again when you come back! Fists: Uhh-huh! (The two go back to the park.) Fists: Hey, yeti! Skips: What do you want now?! Fists: We're going to have a little talk! (Cut to the interior of the garage. It is entirely dark until Fists turns on a light bulb.) Fists: When did you last see the manager? Skips: In the house, so? Fists: Suspicious! Skips: Look, this isn't getting us anywhere, so can I get back to work? Fists: We're not done yet! Skips: Huhhh! Okay. (Later...) Fists: What time was it when you last saw the manager? Skips: How would I know? I don't have a watch. Fists: Come on! Just confess! You did it! Skips: No I didn't! Fists: Come on! Skips: Okay! I'll admit it! Fists: Yes! Skips: I say a person do this to him, but it was too dark to tell who it was! Fists: Keep going! Skips: And that's all I remember! Fists: Hm. That's weird! (A person knocks Fists and Jay out with a shovel.) Pops: Good! You two are awake! Now you can see your beloved boss burnt to death by lava! Donald: You are a bad man! You don't deserve sugar! Pops: Shut up, "Mr. Crotch!" Donald: What!? What is he talking about? Fists: It doesn't matter! Anyway, we need to save Donald! Pops: Good luck! Lava is quite hard to destroy! Fists: Oh, is that so? What about water? Pops: Shoot! Forgot about that! Fists: Jay, grab the hose! (Jay gets the hose.) Pops: Well, it's gonna take more water then that! Fists: That is why us detectives always have ten gallons of water handy! Pops: Seriously?! Since when has this been happening?! Fists: Just last year! Pops: Well, darn it! (Fists and Jay save Donald with pouring all of their water in the lava.) Donald: You two deserve double sugar! Fists: Later. All right, lollipop man, where's the manager!? Pops: You're going to have to find out yourself! Fists: In the closet? Pops:(To himself.): I knew I shouldn't have picked an obvious place! (Fists, Jay and Donald find the park manager, Benson, in the closet, wrapped up with duck tape on his mouth.) Benson:(Muffling.) (Fists rips off the duck tape.) Benson: Thank you! Pops you're fired! Pops: Well, I guess I had it coming. (Donald handcuffs Pops.) Donald: You're under arrest for being a baddie, and not accepting my sugar! Pops: Well, at least I'm old and won't be in jail for long. Fists: Yeah, yeah! Sob story, sob story! Donald: Great job, you two! You get triple sugar! Fists: Uhhh......, that's not really needed. Donald: Of course it is! (Donald gives the two a big sugar hug.) Fists: You're suffocating us! Donald: Oh, sorry! I'm glad to have employees like you! Fists: They say the city's tough. But me and Jay are tougher. This case's lesson: never judge a book by it's cover, and always suspect the least likely person to have committed a crime! Donald: Is my crotch really that noticeable? Fists: No! Not at all! I can't even see it! Donald: Good, cause I was worried for a second! (The End.)